70 replies to this topic

[Goosenka]

I left I took the dog. She found it funny, I think. I need bed bad. My arse hurts. It's cold. My wife hates me. I do like a good clear out though, know what I mean? Shame the paper was like barbed wire. At least they won't accept a return invite Night all

[Nelly Vx]

I told u I'm pissed.

Toilet looked like a bad nappy.!

I just knoenim gonna speak Swahili to the great white telephone

dont go rub your nose in it

[Mangham54]

Goose you absolute legend. Love the booze hate the hangover.

[Goosenka]

I've got that empty feeling. My teeth itch. Vile. Arse went down for a drink. Awful stuff.

Edited by Goosenka, 20 May 2012 - 04:41 AM.

[Sutol]

Brilliant you won't get asked again. Don't know any vegans thank fcuk, aren't they the lot who wanted to destroy the earth for an inter galactic highway.?

[Goosenka]

Brilliant you won't get asked again. Don't know any vegans thank fcuk, aren't they the lot who wanted to destroy the earth for an inter galactic highway.?

No that's the klingons

[CocoPops]

Goose, you're a true leg end!

[Goosenka]

Well, that's me. I guess no one will share with me at the national now Got real gut ache. Lucky I have posh loos to damage today. Just can't believe I have been at work now for three hours already

[james.a]

Brilliant you won't get asked again. Don't know any vegans thank fcuk, aren't they the lot who wanted to destroy the earth for an inter galactic highway.?

That was vogons! Made me chuckle though. Obscure hitchhiker reference.

[leevx2.2]

Goose you complete mad man just read thread you turning into big steve very funny lol :-)

[vocky]

this is the funniest thread for ages

[LMP1]

I ve managed to take a breath after 2-3 minutes of laugh in tears... my belly hurts.

cant stop picturing it

sorry man. You probably shouldnt care much about them. what are they, aliens who dont fart?

it was only a natural "accident". can happen to anybody.

You re the man!

Sometimes when i go to a party i do this when i m bored

Edited by Psychopathis, 20 May 2012 - 09:02 AM.

[JimmyJamJerusalem]

Aww Goose man that's bad luck!! These people need to lighten up though, everybody does it. Apologise but get a stealth dig in of your own. Say it must have been the food

[casino]

Some of u will remember Ive been windy-popping recently. Well its got under control since I had a Milltek fitted...track day and dinner party friendly now....noise down 80% , smell down 95%.

[Goosenka]

I ve managed to take a breath after 2-3 minutes of laugh in tears... my belly hurts.

cant stop picturing it

sorry man. You probably shouldnt care much about them. what are they, aliens who dont fart?

it was only a natural "accident". can happen to anybody.

You re the man!

Sometimes when i go to a party i do this when i m bored

Accident fine. Quiet 'carpet slipper' fart acceptable. You could even cough as you did it. No one would know really. This however would have needed the Welsh National choir on full pelt to cover up the monstrosity that came out my arse

[AliM]

loving your work CT

[Bargi]

I'm assuming you're a Lords today? Mate is there, might have him "pop" around and give you "sh*t" about last night. How's the hangover going?

[Goosenka]

I'm assuming you're a Lords today?
Mate is there, might have him "pop" around and give you "sh*t" about last night.

How's the hangover going?

Yes mate. Dull match.

I'm easy to spot. Three piece suit, walky talky and a nappy on

Edited by Goosenka, 20 May 2012 - 10:49 AM.

[VX-GT]

Right.

So I am drunk at a party.

I don't really drink so it's becoming an issue. I've had only a handful of hours sleep since Thursday due to work and I have to be up again at five tomorrow for work.

I was invited to a party tonight at a vegans house and having xonsumed my body weight in fuking mung bean sh*t this and tofu that I have a had a build up of wind like a mutha fcuker. Due to booze and extreme tiredness I accidentally let a ballistic missile of a fart go that cut tr atmosphere like a knife in more ways that one. It was truly horrendous.

Issue is - how the hell do I come back from this?

Tried apologising but everyone kinda shunned me. It was all rather bad. My wife has stopped talking to me and only one bloke laughed. In fact, he still is.

I explained I was sorry but I keep laughing when I explain it.

Help. It's not funny.

Bloody johnny foreigner
comes over here infiltrates a pill box, drops a gas bomb, trips on escape, gets caught, try's to joke his way out of it

i tell you

IT'S NOT CRICKET OLD BOY

[Goosenka]

Right.

So I am drunk at a party.

I don't really drink so it's becoming an issue. I've had only a handful of hours sleep since Thursday due to work and I have to be up again at five tomorrow for work.

I was invited to a party tonight at a vegans house and having xonsumed my body weight in fuking mung bean sh*t this and tofu that I have a had a build up of wind like a mutha fcuker. Due to booze and extreme tiredness I accidentally let a ballistic missile of a fart go that cut tr atmosphere like a knife in more ways that one. It was truly horrendous.

Issue is - how the hell do I come back from this?

Tried apologising but everyone kinda shunned me. It was all rather bad. My wife has stopped talking to me and only one bloke laughed. In fact, he still is.

I explained I was sorry but I keep laughing when I explain it.

Help. It's not funny.

Bloody johnny foreigner
comes over here infiltrates a pill box, drops a gas bomb, trips on escape, gets caught, try's to joke his way out of it

i tell you

IT'S NOT CRICKET OLD BOY

The great escape springs to mind as well