I have CDO. It's like OCD but arranged in the correct alphabetical order.
One Liners :lol:
Started by
Nelly Vx
, Oct 09 2012 10:02 PM
684 replies to this topic
#201
KurtVerbose
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- 3,779 posts
His Serene Highness
- Gender:Male
- Location:Merlischachen
- Interests:Big baps.
Posted 10 August 2013 - 07:43 PM
#202
PaulCP
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- 6,064 posts
Whipping Boy
- Gender:Male
- Location:Suffolk
Posted 10 August 2013 - 08:26 PM
Chatting to the wife the other day, I said "treasure ....................."
I always call her treasure since she looks like something that's just been dug up
#203
The Fat Man
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- 336 posts
Super Member
- Gender:Male
- Location:Galway, Ireland. and London.
Posted 10 August 2013 - 09:07 PM
Was having a sneaky p*ss in the deep end of the local pool.
Lifeguard wasn't too pleased, fecker blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in!
#204
Harry Hornet
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- 4,972 posts
Scary Internerd
- Gender:Not Telling
- Location:x
Posted 11 August 2013 - 12:54 PM
Ive just been to Swizterland
I visited Dignitas
In the morning when I went to breakfeast I was the only one there
They were serving Cheerios
#205
Rickwoo118
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- 5,800 posts
Scary Internerd
- Gender:Male
- Location:Stamford
Posted 11 August 2013 - 04:05 PM
LOLI'm wearing that new breadcrumb scented after-shave... The birds love it.
#206
Claws
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- 5,246 posts
Stage FA NA FTW!
- Gender:Male
- Location:Motherwell
- Interests:Daft plastic cars
Posted 28 August 2013 - 10:19 AM
Shakin' Stevens has announced that he is now on the correct medication and from now on would like to be known as Even Stevens
#207
MWS
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- 1,229 posts
Need to get Out More
- Gender:Male
- Location:Manchester
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Interests:Football - Stockport County & VFB Stuttgart
Cars - VX220s
Basketball - Miami Heat
Posted 28 August 2013 - 11:14 AM
A few from Stewart Francis' collection:
[*]I always wondered why a frisbee always appears bigger the closer it gets...........and then it hit me.
[/list]
[*]My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.......... We'll see about that
[/list]
[*]I wrote a book about a transsexual with a speech impediment. It's called Man or Myth
[/list]
[*]I want to donate a large amount of money to a rape clinic and I won't take no for an answer
[/list]
[*]My dad has a wierd hobby he collects empty bottles, which sounds so much better than alcoholic
[/list]
[*]I have a girlfriend, I've been going out with my girlfriend for........sex!
[/list]
#208
hairy
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- 5,912 posts
Moonlander
- Gender:Male
- Location:Bristol
- Interests:cars, beer, nature
Posted 05 September 2013 - 08:45 PM
There's no point calling for a ban on fracking. You'd only drive it underground.
#209
CHILL Gone DUTCH
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- 13,727 posts
I ADMIT BATMAN THINKS HE IS QUICKER THAN ME
- Gender:Male
- Location:UK
Posted 05 September 2013 - 08:46 PM
What do you call a elephant in a letter box::
Stuck !!
#210
hairy
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- 5,912 posts
Moonlander
- Gender:Male
- Location:Bristol
- Interests:cars, beer, nature
Posted 05 October 2013 - 07:58 AM
If you buy all Adam & The Ants sheet music, they'll throw in a stand & deliver.
#211
KurtVerbose
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- 3,779 posts
His Serene Highness
- Gender:Male
- Location:Merlischachen
- Interests:Big baps.
Posted 06 October 2013 - 09:35 AM
Don't trust atoms. They make up everything.
#212
TheRealVXed
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- 5,975 posts
Sidekick
- Gender:Male
- Location:Gotham City
- Interests:Holy potatoes, fist combat, lycra
Posted 08 October 2013 - 01:39 PM
I saw a dead baby ghost in the street the other day.................. on second thoughts it could have been a hankerchief...
#213
Claws
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- 5,246 posts
Stage FA NA FTW!
- Gender:Male
- Location:Motherwell
- Interests:Daft plastic cars
Posted 12 October 2013 - 03:06 PM
Some people like Julian Casablancas, some like Albert Hammond Jr, my favourite is Nikolai Fraiture.
I guess it's different Strokes for different folks! 
Edited by Claws, 12 October 2013 - 03:07 PM.
#214
hairy
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- 5,912 posts
Moonlander
- Gender:Male
- Location:Bristol
- Interests:cars, beer, nature
Posted 13 October 2013 - 08:24 AM
Just saw a dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a cat flap.
#215
Claws
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- 5,246 posts
Stage FA NA FTW!
- Gender:Male
- Location:Motherwell
- Interests:Daft plastic cars
Posted 13 October 2013 - 08:54 AM
Just saw a dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a cat flap.
#216
KurtVerbose
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- 3,779 posts
His Serene Highness
- Gender:Male
- Location:Merlischachen
- Interests:Big baps.
Posted 13 October 2013 - 11:03 AM
I'm fed up with the excuses women come up with to avoid having sex, like; 'I'm tired, I'm washing my hair, I've got a headache, I'm your sister...
#217
NickA
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- 477 posts
Super Member
- Gender:Male
- Location:Fowlmere, Cambridgeshire
Posted 15 October 2013 - 09:05 AM
Just saw a dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a cat flap.
I'm printing this one off on tiny bits of paper and sticking it in every christmas cracker I come across this year, thank you hehehehe
#218
hairy
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- 5,912 posts
Moonlander
- Gender:Male
- Location:Bristol
- Interests:cars, beer, nature
Posted 23 October 2013 - 07:01 PM
A new Muslim version of Playboy has just been unveiled...
#219
Martin of the North
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- 58 posts
Member
- Gender:Male
- Location:Trough of Bowland
- Interests:Field Hockey, Cycling, Skiing, Books and Films
Posted 24 October 2013 - 02:25 PM
Hedgehogs ... why can't they just share the hedge ?
#220
starman
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- 44 posts
Member
- Gender:Male
- Location:Portsmouth (ish)
Posted 01 November 2013 - 04:48 PM
Rabbit hutch builders - they'll give you a run for your bunny.
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