Breaking news: The inventor of the anagram has died......"May he erect a penis".
One Liners :lol:
Started by
Nelly Vx
, Oct 09 2012 10:02 PM
684 replies to this topic
#281
RabnaKS
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If anyone can talk Bllx, I can!💣
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Posted 10 October 2014 - 08:59 PM
#282
RabnaKS
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- 2,717 posts
If anyone can talk Bllx, I can!💣
- Gender:Male
- Location:Wakefield West Yorkshire
- Interests:MTB, VX220, oh & cars, golf, sarcasm with humour!
Posted 10 October 2014 - 09:06 PM
Interesting Human Body Facts
- The largest cell in the human body is the female egg, and the smallest is the male sperm.
- A full bladder is roughly the size of a soft ball (a bit bigger than a cricket ball).
- It takes food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
- The attachment of human muscles to skin is what causes dimples.
- The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.
- A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
- If the average male never shaved, his beard would be 13 feet long when he died.
- Men with hairless chests are more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men with hair.
- There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
- Side by side, 2000 cells from the human body could cover about one square inch.
- Women blink twice as much as men.
- The average person's skin weighs twice as much as their brain.
- When you are looking at someone you love, your pupils dilate...they do the same when you are looking at someone you hate!
- Your ears secrete more earwax when you are afraid than when you aren't.
- Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
- If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
- The average woman is 5 inches shorter than the average man.
*** You looked at your thumb... Didn't you?
http://www.sickipedi...the-human-36275 #Sickipedia
#283
speedster
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Future of Speed
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Posted 10 October 2014 - 09:36 PM
Nobody move.....
#284
speedster
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Future of Speed
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Posted 10 October 2014 - 10:15 PM
It's OK now. Dinosaur's gone.
#285
hairy
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Moonlander
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Posted 28 November 2014 - 08:22 AM
The inventor of predictive text has died....his funfair will be hello on Sundial.
#286
KurtVerbose
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His Serene Highness
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- Interests:Big baps.
Posted 10 December 2014 - 09:57 PM
A family walks into a hotel and the father if the porn is disabled. The guy at the desk replies “It’s just regular porn you sick f*ck.”
#287
Ali87
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Billy No Mates
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Posted 10 December 2014 - 10:17 PM
A man walks into a bar. "OUCH"
#288
Ali87
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Billy No Mates
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Posted 10 December 2014 - 10:28 PM
Viagra now make eye drops. They make you look well hard
#289
Potatoes
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Super Duper Member
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Posted 11 December 2014 - 04:12 PM
Watson! I've overdosed on Immodium! No sh!t, Sherlock.
#290
Stevie Dubyah
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Billy No Mates
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- Interests:Invasive Operations
Posted 15 January 2015 - 11:59 AM
Rolf Harris, Stu Hall and Jimmy Saville walk into O'Neills. Barman says "Oh no! Not Yew Tree again"
#291
TheRealVXed
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Sidekick
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Posted 15 January 2015 - 12:47 PM
Rolf Harris, Stu Hall and Jimmy Saville walk into O'Neills. Barman says "Oh no! Not Yew Tree again"
#292
furtive
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Need to get Out More
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Posted 15 January 2015 - 12:49 PM
A man walks into a bar and says "have you got any helicopter crisps"?
The barman replies "no sorry, only plain"
#293
moospeed
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Billy No Mates
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Posted 16 January 2015 - 06:24 AM
A SQL query walks into a bar and asks "can I JOIN these two tables?"
#294
the outsider
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Super Member
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Posted 19 January 2015 - 11:09 AM
Watching the tv, My wife said to me one day " I want to go somewhere ive never been before,
I took her to the kitchen
#295
the outsider
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- 297 posts
Super Member
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Posted 19 January 2015 - 11:11 AM
A chauvinistic one
why are womens feet smaller than mens, so they nearer the sink
its bad, I know
#296
hairy
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Moonlander
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- Location:Bristol
- Interests:cars, beer, nature
Posted 20 January 2015 - 06:52 AM
Imagine if Whoopi Goldberg had married Peter Cushing.
#297
The Knobs
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Scary Internerd
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Posted 20 January 2015 - 11:25 PM
Just reading through a few pages, Kurt is one liner king so far
#298
KurtVerbose
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His Serene Highness
- Gender:Male
- Location:Merlischachen
- Interests:Big baps.
Posted 21 January 2015 - 10:08 AM
the future, past and present went into a bar.
It was tense
A wigwam and a tepee went into a bar.
It was two tents.
#299
Ali87
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Billy No Mates
- Gender:Male
- Location:Doune
Posted 21 January 2015 - 12:57 PM
Had a fight in a campsite, it was in tents
Edited by Ali87, 21 January 2015 - 12:57 PM.
#300
Andrew aka Stuwy
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Made In England
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Posted 21 January 2015 - 05:06 PM
What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? Their balls are just for decoration.
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